Dream A Little Dream With Me

The dreams have troubled me a little. There are several different variations, wispy visions that have crawled into my somnolent psyche the past two weeks. They differ in content, but the theme is always the same. I am on my way to some destination, but I never reach this nebulous point; something always stops me. In the dreams I do my best to work my way through the continuous obstacles, but I wake up feeling oddly frustrated that I have not gotten “there,” wherever or whatever “there” is.

I feel a little too seasoned to still be suffering from “what is my purpose,” angst, yet I surmise this is what the dreams are all about. “Where do you want me to go, Lord, and when I get there, what do you want me to do?”

Dr. Tony Evans of the Urban Alternative asks the question, “How do you know when God is working in your life?” He then answers with this statement, “When things happen over which you have absolutely no control.” I have seen this intervention in my life, especially in the last few years, but rather than being content with God’s Providence (though I am thrilled with the path He seems to be laying out before me), I am still more than a little concerned about those matters that are still in a state of flux.

The Apostle Paul whispers in my ear: “Whatever state I am in, I have learned to be content.” How in the world does one learn to be content? Isn’t contentment a state of being rather than an act of the will? How do I chase away anxious stomach butterflies while I demand, “Donna be content”? What did Paul know that I have yet to learn?

I’m probably the last one to get this, but it seems to me, if I understand Paul at all, that contentment just has to be an act of the will through a life that is grounded in Christ (Galatians 2:20). I must choose to trust God in and through all my moments, good, bad or indifferent. This trust relies on His promises to never leave nor forsake me, that He has designed an intricate pattern for my life and I can rely on Him to bring me to that place of specificity. Anxiety can be overridden with prayer. Doubt can be trumped by faith. Fear can be vanquished with love. Purpose is founded in Christ. The dreams may persist, but since I know the Lord orders my steps, I will not fear.

“If God be for us, who [or what] can be against us?”

No one and nothing, not even our dreams.